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Betty asks…

CHILD CUSTODY HELP 10 pts for best answer!?

Ok, i met my fiance winter 2010, his daughter had stayed that whole year and she went to visit her mom for christmas break and her mom didnt allow her to return. (they were never married, there has never been a custody order, my fiance is on childsupport) We started dating febuary of the next year. Spring break on the 14th my sd mother called and said that there was no food in the house and asked my fiance to buy some, (he did but come to find out she gets her snap benefits on the 14th) My fiance moved from GA to AL with me in april but befire he came he had to be in GA for his daughter because he was watching her while her mother persued a modeling career. We missed my sd 5th grade graduation because we heard about it at the last min. The whole time he was in al he was actively looking for a job, but everyone wanted to see the paperwork from when he was locked up falsely accused. In june they had a contempt of childsupport caout date in which he payed her $170, we left to get his expungement papers while we was at the public safety he was arrested for a child abandonment warrant that the childs mother had put out on him. Because they did not write out a receipt at the courthouse then he was arrested and had to pay $398 to purge out. After getting out he payed his childsupport each month ontime. By august we starting getting phone calls from mom for complaints at school, sd not doing work or fighting getting supened ect. By the end of aug, my sd had to be evaluated because she told a teacher she wanted to kill herself. This behavior carried on. In october we took sd shopping for her birthday. In november my stepdaughter came and spent thanksgiving break wit us, without question she informed us that her mother never buys her nutting with her cs, she spends it on weed & herdelf. And my sd has seen pronos of her mom with men and weoman. She also informed us she had a 16 year old friend whom does drugs and is sexually active (my sd is 12). We took her back home my sd got depressed because her mom wasnt doing anything for the holiday, we have a text from mom stating this, that she(mom) was depressed, she wasnt doin nuttin & there was no food in the house. Bout a week later my sd ended up moving with her father and I because she had gotten in so much trouble they had sentenced her to alternative school. To prevent this her mom withdrew her and brought her to us, She brought some clothes, school paperwork, birth certificate, ssn card & a letter that she signed giving my fiance primary custody, from that date with no end date and it also said no obligation to pay child support while child with us. Child was also failing the 6th grade she had a 43% avg when she arrived here . All while here her mom tired to dictate everything that we did. We pushed our wedding back because my sd needed so much attention. Anyway her mom never really called her and never came and picked her up or visited even though she would promise my sd these things. I have a letter from sd saying she felt her mother never came though with her promises. Anyway momma caused alot of drama spring break so my fiance filed for custody and psycho denied it. She lost custody of her younger 2 kids last fall because of negligence. Anyway my sd grades improved tramendously by the time she left she also was promoted and is in regular class. her mom came in got her 2 days after school got out and she refusinf to return her. She say she was only here because she didnt want her to go to alternative school but i also have a email from steudent relations that she isnt eligible for traditional school there until Jan 2013. My sd was also seeing a counselor every week when she was here. When they came and got my sd they wasnt able to withdraw her from school because it was the weekend, and we didnt hand over any paperwork not even birthcertificate and ssn card. My fiance did file for a court date and it is on 8/29/2012, I wrote my sd on facebook a few days before fathers day, her mom wrote back on fathers day telling me/us to never attemp to contact her child again. She started calling on the 22 private,restricted or blocked to talk to my fiance, then she leaves a message stating that there is a childsupport court date on 8/8/2012. She also verbally admitted that she was not gonna allow my fiance contact with the child and that we want get her contact number, but she felt it was immature that we wouldnt answer the phone for her. Anyway she has now threaten to change child ssn. Anyway childsupport is in Ga and the custody is in AL. So you think they should hold off on cs til after custody has been establisted? Do you think we have a case for custody? Will her mother be able to withdraw her out of school without coming back and withdrawing her personally? Can she change her ssn number? What do you think er should do? We do have certified refences like teachers, counselor,old teachers. And her mom only have family n friends!!

Potter answers:

Sorry, just a little long to read, and he needs to be putting all this into a Chronological Statement.

As for holding off on child support, at the minimum he should be putting the money away as he would be ordered to pay retroactive child support when an order comes through, provided he does not have custody.

For 22 years, I have volunteered my time working with divorced/single fathers dealing in family law issues, such as child support, teaching them about what the states are not telling support obligors.
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